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Friday, August 19, 2016

Taking A Break!

Once in a great while I get to take a break from my decorating business.  It doesn't happen too often because a decorating project cane last several months and one job overlaps with the next.  My newest project doesn't begin until mid-September and my last project was completed on Wednesday.

As you know, I also teach dance  to young girls in the evening and on weekends.  Well, school started today and we always take a break during the first two weeks of school to make certain the girls get the school year started correctly.

So...I am taking a few weeks off to become a veggie!  I will be in Florida for a few days to see my dad and then I am off to New York to spend a few days with my oldest and dearest friend. After that...who knows!  I may just sleep on the beach somewhere!  LOL  Not really.  Too sandy! 

I am taking a few weeks away from my blog too, so you won't be seeing any new postings for awhile.  Down time for me means down time from everything!

I'll begin posting again after my break/vacation/holiday....

Love you all!

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Sexual Fun and Games

Here are a few ideas gleaned from Fifty Shades of Grey. While these ideas came from that book, I have taken the liberty of making them more acceptable to most lovers. After all, not everyone can get into the kink with the aggressive approach presented in the book.


Ladies - Blindfold your man. Use one of his own neckties as the blindfold for an added bit of mystery and kink. Then lead him to an area of your home where you have never had sex before. Lead him around the house for a bit first until you are pretty sure that he has no idea where he is. This will be hot for you but it will drive him crazy! You are now in total control because he can’t see anything. His disorientation will make this hot for both of you.

Gentlemen – You can play this game too by blindfolding her and finding that same space in the house. When you blindfold her, use one of her scarfs or even a piece of lingerie, assuming she has something in her drawer that she can’t see through.


Role-play is something that I totally love. I could consume several posts just sharing the details of some of my favorites. Here is one from Fifty Shade of Grey, modified for the more conservative among us.

Ladies - In this scenario you call him “Sir” or “Professor” or “Mr.” or whatever dominant title you prefer. If you forget to refer to him with these terms, or if you use his first name, you get a sexy spanking.

Gentlemen – You can play this too by reversing the roles. You must refer to her as “Ms.” or “Madam”, or “Mrs.” or whatever. The spanking rules now apply to you so get ready for a pink bottom.  She may enjoy this more than you think.


This is another of my favorite games. It is primarily a foreplay game but it adds an element of heat that will send both lovers over the edge.


Ladies - Instruct your guy to sit in a chair. Be sure there is room all the way around the chair for you to use. Slowly strip out of your clothes until you are wearing only your panties. A thong is the best for this game. Finally strip off your thong and use it to tie his hands together behind him. Then give him a lap dance. This will be an “off the charts” tease because you are now untouchable because his hands are tied.

There are three versions of this game. The man in the chair can fully dressed, or partially dressed, or totally naked. Depending upon the version you select, your imagination will direct your actions very well!


Ladies - Wear black, over-the-knee boots and nothing else. If you don’t have those boots, get creative and come up with something less expensive that still sends the same dominant signal, such as black stockings and black high heels – and nothing else! Push him against the wall. Do it gently but firmly. Then tug at his hair, lean in close to his ear and whisper, "You're going to do whatever I say tonight."


Ladies – Have your man pin you to the bed, then playfully resist. Don’t fight too hard but attempt to close your legs to deny him entry. Naturally, he will eventually win out and penetrate you. The temporary denial will make the moment of entry – well – special to say the least.

Gentlemen – While it may be a bit of a stretch for you to resist your lady, you can give it a try. Just reverse the roles and resist her advances by pushing her hands away from your erect cock. Good Luck!


Ladies - Cut a small hole in the crotch of a sexy pair of your panties. Don’t tell him you did that. As the foreplay begins to heat up put his hand between your legs and hold it there until he finds the little tear. Then tell him that you can’t wait to feel his cock inside of you and tell him to rip your panties off and fuck you.

Gentlemen – This is another game that may not work well in reverse. Nevertheless, when you force your lover’s hand to your crotch and tell her to rip off your underwear, you may find it very stimulating.


One of my favorite sexual encounters involves an element of surprise.

Ladies - While he's watching TV, drop to your knees, pull down his pants and give him oral sex. This works the best if you do not say a single word. Just give him head until he climaxes. When he is finished, don’t say anything and don’t pull up his pants. Just plop down on the sofa next to him and change the channel to something you want to watch. He won’t care what channel you select – I promise.

One word of caution. If he is a football fan, do not try this during the game. Even a surprise blowjob cannot compete with his favorite football game.


Ladies - Offer to masturbate for him. Let him give you instructions and do what he asks you to do. Don’t be shy. Men spend a great deal of time thinking about what it is like to watch a woman play with herself. He will love it and so will you.

Gentlemen – This is a game that is difficult for you to pull off because your lover knows that you jerk off as often as possible. Therefore, watching your masturbate doesn’t have the same intrigue. However, don’t despair! There is a solution and that is mutual masturbation. You sit on one side of the room and have your lady sit on the other. You tell her want to do and she tells you what to do. Try it! It’s fun!


Ladies - Go down on him but before you begin tell him that he cannot climax until you give your permission. If he gets close, back away and then start again. Take your time and make him wait to climax. How and when you let him cum is up to you. If you enjoy the sensation of his cock exploding in your mouth, filling your mouth with cum – great! If that isn’t your thing, when you decide it is time for him to cum, just finish him off by hand or get on top of him and slip his cock inside. Either way, the temporary denial will provide him with an extreme climax

Gentlemen - You can do this too by reversing the roles and going down on her.


These ideas are “thought starters”. Don’t limit yourself. Experiment and add (or subtract) from the template. Sex should be uninhibited and fun. We too often fall into the trap of sameness, which can lead to boredom. If your sex life has become boring, take charge and talk to your partner. Show him (or her) this list and pick one – just one is all it takes – to get started. Wishing you all wonderful, fulfilling, hair-curling sex!

Monday, August 8, 2016

Who is Derri Oakes?

Recently I received this e-mail:

I have been reading your blog for a long time.  You always surprise me with the kind of information you post.  Maybe you can help me find some information on Derri Oakes.  Have ever heard of her?  A friend has an old 8MM movie of her doing a striptease that is probably from the 1950's.  I have looked everywhere trying to find out who she is but can't find anything about her at all.  If you have time to research her background or if you already know about her please tell me.

I love your blog.  Keep up the good work.

This turned out to be quite a project that ended in a virtual dead end.  I referred to Encyclopedia Britannica,,, and a dozen other resources but was unable to find out much about Derri Oakes.  I can only verify that she was the primary performer in two separate strip tease films produced sometime in the late 1950's.

She is beautiful and has an amazing figure.  Keep in mind that when Ms. Oakes performed there were no "boob jobs" or anything like that.  What you see in her films is her natural beauty.

Here is one of her films that is entitled "Wildcat".  It would appear that this is one of the few records of Derri Oakes, since there does not appear to be any biological information about her whatsoever.


If you watch this film, be sure to take enough time to watch it until the end.  It is a real study in what a risque film was all about in those days before most of us were born.  By today's standards this would be considered very tame but I imagine this movie was hot as hell in the 1950's.

Friday, August 5, 2016

Japanese Geisha are Special People

Many people think a Japanese Geisha as a glorified prostitute or call girl. This stereotype is completely off the mark. While there is a sexual component whenever a man and a woman interact, Geisha are actually entertainers. They are vigorously trained in art, music and dancing. In fact the translation of Geisha from Japanese to English is artist.

Being a true Geisha is an honor to the girls who strive to become fully trained and fully accredited Geisha. These young women are called “Geiko”. If a girl begins her training to be a Geisha before she is 21, she is called a “Maiko”, which means child dancer. A girl or woman can become a Geisha even if she wasn’t a Maiko, but if she had been a Maiko she would enjoy much more prestige.

The role of  the Geisha has been tainted by prostitutes who call themselves Geisha in order to bring in more customers. But there are distinct differences between prostitutes and Geisha. Geisha do not have sex with customers. 


There is also a subtle but significant difference in the way they secure their kimono.

Both girls wear a kimono, and over their kimono is an obi (or sash). But here is the difference.  Geisha tie their obi in the back, and prostitutes tie it in the front.

There is a simple reason for this, you can’t tie it yourself if it is in the back.  You see, Geisha have assistance when they dress and once dressed they stay that way. But if the girl is a prostitute, she will personally need to tie the obi and untie it several times throughout the day as she has sex with different men. Geisha do not engage in paid sex with clients.


Many people assume that a Geisha is a courtesan, but they are not. While some girls may have a “danna” (client or customer) who takes a unique and usually exclusive interest in them, it doesn’t mean they will automatically become intimate, although, over time they most likely will.

The “danna” pays for all of the Geisha’s expenses, sort of like a mistress, but the relationship is a very intricate one that is not well understood. This may be a topic for a future post but for today, let's move on.


Sadly, some girls are sold to the okiya, or Geisha House.  Fortunately this isn't too common today in the more reputable districts. Most Geisha choose the profession. Daughters of Geisha follow in their mother's footsteps and usually became Geisha themselves, likely taking over the mother’s Geisha role at some point.


During the first stage of training, the girls are put to work as maids and have to do everything they are told. This stage of training was called “shikomi”. The youngest of all the girls, or the newest to the house, would have to wait up until the most senior Geisha returned home so that she could assist her in getting ready for bed. This could be as late as 3AM.

Also during this time the girls would be attending the “hanamachi” Geisha school to learn the traditions, dialect and the dress.


Once the girl has finished her shikomi training by becoming proficient in all of her classes and passing a dance exam, she will be relieved of her “maid” duties and moved to the second stage of training, which is called “Minarai”. This training will take place away from the Geisha House.  The Minarai are there mostly to be seen and not heard.

During this phase of training, the Minarai’s kimono is developed with very expressive and impressive designs. This is because their kimono is supposed to speak for them - describe their style and disposition.  I suppose we could compare that to an American woman who wears a red dress and high heels, or to one who wears Levis and a tank top.  Each outfit speaks to a different personality or mood.

A Minarai teams up with an “onisan”, or older sister. She follows her to her events and mainly observes or pours tea. A Minarai could also work closely with an “okamisan”, who is the proprietor of her Geisha House. She’ll learn the art of conversation and how to play games.


After she completes this stage she is promoted to “Maiko”, an apprentice Geisha. While the first two stages of her training are relatively short, lasting from several months up to one year, the Maiko stage could last several years.

The Maiko will go with her onee-san everywhere, but now she may participate. The onee-san teaches the Maiko how to be a true Geisha, training her is the arts of tea ceremony, flower arrangement, calligraphy, playing the shamisen, which is a three string instrument, dancing, and conversation. She will help the new Maiko pick a new professional name and she will perfect intricate design of her hair and unique creation of her makeup.

Hair is washed about once a week, and the design is so intricate it has to be done by a professional. A thick white foundation is applied to the face, neck and chest. A line is left around the hairline to create a ‘mask’ look. And a 'W' like shape is left at the back of the neck. Black is then traced around the eyes and eyebrows, a Maiko also traditionally wears red around the eyes too. The lips are then colored, red, but not the entire lip, only parts of the lip.

After three years of wearing her makeup, the Maiko will typically evolve to a more subdued style. Many established Geisha only wear their makeup when doing a special performance.


After her onisan feels she is ready, the Maiko will become a full-fledged Geisha.  This is a highly prestigious and revered position.  And on a more pragmatic note, she can now charge full price when she displays her artful skills as a Geisha.

Here is a very interesting tidbit – The Geisha’s disposition and attitude is different my region. For example, a Tokyo Geisha is likely to be sassy, while a Geisha from Kyoto will be more demure.

There are two types of Geisha. The “Tachikata”, mainly dances while the “Jikata” is primarily a singer and musician. The “Tachikata” is usually a younger girl and the “Jikata” is an older, more established Geisha.

So if you are looking for a prostitute, you are mistaken to call her Geisha. Geisha’s are sometimes paid escorts who will accompany you to a party or they are women who attend the party and are paid for their entertainment or for acting as a hostess. They will pour tea, entertain you with a song, perform a delightful dance, play a musical instrument and chat with the guests. They will do much to make certain you enjoy yourself but you may have noticed that “have sex with customers” is NOT part of the bill of fare.

If you are looking to get laid, you are looking in the wrong place.

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

The Sexual-Response Cycle

Okay, just about everyone enjoys having sex. Of course, some more than others but nevertheless, having sex is something almost everyone enjoys. But, I bet very few of us have thought about what happens physiologically while we are engaged in the act of sex.

You have probably heard of Masters and Johnson. They are two sex therapists who literally wrote the book on sexual interaction. They actually coined the term "sexual-response cycle". This is the sequence of events that happens to the body when a person becomes sexually aroused and participates in any sexual activity. They don’t limit their study to intercourse, but include masturbation, foreplay, oral sex, and so on.

While there is much variation among individuals, as well as between different sexual events, Masters and Johnson broke the sexual act into four phases. They are excitement, plateau, orgasm and resolution.

Both men and women go through all four phases, except the timing is different. Men typically reach orgasm first during intercourse, while women usually take longer. So, if you are dreaming of that illusive simultaneous orgasm – it is pretty rare.

Phase One: Excitement

This phase usually begins within 10 to 30 seconds after erotic stimulation. This phase can last for a very short time – a minute or two – or can go on for hours.

This is the stage when the penis becomes slightly erect and his nipples may also become erect. Vaginal lubrication begins and the vagina expands and lengthens. The outer lips, inner lips, clitoris and sometimes breasts begin to swell. Both lovers experience increased heart rate, advanced blood pressure and accelerated breathing.

I am not sure how men can spend much time in this phase. From my personal experience, it seems that a penis turns into a fully functioning cock very rapidly. Once that happens, the guy is ready to move on to the next phase. Truth be told, many men, it seems, would prefer to skip directly to orgasm! I’m not picking on your guys but it is certainly a pleasure to find someone who can and is willing to stay in phase one for a bit.

Phase Two: Plateau

The changes that started in the excitement phase continue to progress. The man’s balls are drawn up into his scrotum and his penis becomes fully erect. This is what I like to call – “Turn a penis into a cock”. Tacky! I know but I love saying that.

The woman’s vaginal lips become puffier. The tissues of the walls of the outer third of the vagina swell and the opening to the vagina narrows. The clitoris disappears into its hood. The inner labia (lips) change color (although it's a bit hard to notice). For women who've never had children, the lips turn from pink to bright red. In women who've had children, the color turns from bright red to deep purple.

Breathing and pulse rates quicken. A "sex flush" may appear on the stomach, chest, shoulders, neck or face. Muscles tense in the thighs, hips, hands and buttocks, and spasms may begin.

Since the next phase is orgasm, I assume that Masters and Johnson intended for phase two to include the actually act of sex or at least sexual arousal through masturbation or oral sex or whatever.

Phase Three: Orgasm

This is the climax of the cycle. Isn’t it interesting that the most intense phase of the “cycle” is the shortest, usually lasting only a few seconds. Okay, I know! You have been watching adult films and see the guy cumming in huge amounts and the sequence that seems to last for five minutes. Then you go home and make love to your wife and when you cum it is “squirt, squirt, done. Well guys, relax! A few seconds works just fine for everyone involved. Trust me on this one.

If you prefer the more biological description – First seminal fluid collects in the urethral bulb. This is when a man may have the sensation that orgasm is certain, or "ejaculatory inevitability." Next, semen is ejaculated from the penis. Contractions occur in the penis during the orgasmic phase. The first third of the vaginal walls contract rhythmically every eight-tenths of a second. The muscles of the uterus also contract barely noticeably. Breathing, pulse rate and blood pressure continue to rise. Muscle tension and blood-vessel engorgement reach a peak. Sometimes orgasm comes with a grasping-type muscular reflex of the hands and feet.

Phase Four: Resolution

This phase is a return to the normal resting state. It can last from a few minutes to a half-hour or longer. This stage is generally longer for women than men. Ladies, this is the moment when he rolls over and starts snoring. Sorry guys but you know it’s true.

The cock becomes a penis again and returns to its normal flaccid state. There is usually a refractory period, where it's impossible to orgasm again until a certain amount of time has passed. While the amount of time varies among men by age, fitness and other factors, one thing is certain. When a guy says “I can go all night”, he is really saying “I can go several times as long as you give me a little recovery time in between.”

Contrast that with Masters and Johnson findings for women when they say, “Some women may be able to respond to additional stimulation with additional orgasms”.

Well, there you have it!    The Sexual-Response Cycle according to sex therapists Masters and Johnson. 

I think of this "cycle" a little differently.

Phase 1:  Help him get hard and make sure your pussy is wet
Phase 2:  Enjoy the rhythm of the sexual act, whether oral, vaginal or otherwise.
Phase 3:  Climax
Phase 4:  Ignore the snoring and cover him up

Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Dear Diary - July 30, 2016

Well, my Saturday date with Josh has come and gone.  Part was great and part was not-so-great.


Josh arrived in Tulsa earlier than I expected so I had him come by the house and hang around with me while I finished preparing our dinner.  He sat at the counter and our conversation picked up exactly were we left off a few days earlier.

The spaghetti sauce was simmering on the stove and our conversation began to simmer too. 

Eventually, Josh came around the counter, took me in his arms and kissed me - deeply and romantically.  After a few moments I took him by the hand and guided him into my bedroom.

"Dinner is going to be late." I teased.

We made love for an hour or so.  It was incredible!  

We had a late dinner.  He said it was the best spaghetti sauce he had ever tasted.  It should be.  It is my great grandmother's recipe direct from Italy.

After dinner, our conversation resumed, mixed with some sensual snuggling and making out.  Eventually, we went back to my bedroom, lay on the bed, snuggled, made out, and chatted.


Then the evening took a bizarre and disturbing turn for the worst.  Josh's cell phone rang.  He looked at the screen and said it was a call that he had to take.  He went into the hallway and took the call.  He was very quiet but when he came back into the room, I knew instantly!

He confirmed my suspicion.  The phone call was from his wife!  YEP!  WIFE! 

Several months ago, he told me that he and his wife broke up and got a divorce.  That turned out to be untrue. 


If he had been honest with me, I probably still would have agreed to see him as he came through town.  I probably still would have invited him to dinner at my home and probably still would have ended up in bed with him.  But when I found out he was lying about being married, I was disappointed, hurt, and - I suppose - a bit angry.

Anyway....Live and learn!

Sunday, July 31, 2016

Animations - A Test

One of the most common requests that I receive from readers is that I post explicit videos.  That is something that I have not done for many reasons - until now.  But with the magic of computer animation, I can post these videos with a greater degree of anonymity for those involved.

If this concept isn't too weird, let me know and I will post more from time to time.  It is is just dumb, let me know that too...Thanks!



Special Thanks to:
Vince and Carl for your willingness to experiment
Mike for your exceptional video skills
Roger for teaching me to use the animation software.

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Dear Diary - July 27, 2016

What a lovely day!

One of my long-time blog readers was passing through Tulsa on his way from Missouri to Texas.  He e-mailed and asked if we could meet as he came through town.  I have a hard fast rule that I do not meet people from the Internet but Josh has been writing to me for two years and has always seemed sane.  He suggested dinner but I declined.  Then he offered lunch.  After some thought I agreed to meet in the afternoon for a glass of iced tea.

When I walked into the cafĂ©, I spotted him sitting in a booth by the window.  It was gratifying to see that the photos he had sent to me were actually of him.  He stood up and waved as I entered.  We exchanged a polite hug and sat down.

The afternoon dissolved into conversation and before I knew it, more than two hours had passed.  It was as though we had been friends all of our lives.  Of course, we have been writing to each other for more than two years so we knew a lot about each other.  That helped.

Josh asked me if I would reconsider his dinner offer.  I accepted and he decided to stay in a hotel for the night and head for Dallas the next day.  I went back to my studio and finished my work before heading home to prepare for my dinner date with Josh.

We had a wonderful dinner at The Polo Grill (one of my favorite restaurants in all of Tulsa) and the interesting and stimulating conversation continued.  We were literally the last people to leave the restaurant.

I am sure you know what happened next.  Josh asked me to come to his hotel room - or - could he come home with me.  We both knew what that would mean.  It would mean that Josh and I would end up in bed together.  Believe me, I wanted that to happen just as much as he did.  I almost said yes but instead offered an alternative plan.  He said he would be coming back through Tulsa on Saturday.  My alternative plan included me preparing dinner for him at my home on Saturday evening.  I also told him that he would not need to check into a hotel.  He could stay with me.

We enjoyed a long luxurious kiss in the parking lot before we parted company for the evening.

Needless to say, I immediately regretted sending Josh to his hotel room alone but I knew it was the right thing to do.

Now I am totally looking forward to Saturday!

Saturday, July 23, 2016

From Sheri's Mail Bag - Masturbation

My recent post about male masturbation techniques generated some interesting e-mail and comments.  Some of them are a bit off topic but I thought you might enjoy reading them anyway.  I have removed the names of the senders for obvious reasons.

Here are some comments and e-mails from my blog readers:

Hi Sheri,

Was reading your post on "How Do You Masturbate" and wanted to answer your question....I'm a fan of the tantric method. Taking the time to feel that pressure build and hold out long enough to have pre-cum start flowing freely always ends up with the best orgasm. Although I tend to not put my hands behind my head I focus on slowly pulling my testicles down letting them slide between my fingers. It takes the edge off but continues to build that full feeling.

You mentioned webcams in your post...always fun to find a partner that likes to give JOI especially for the tantric method.

I didn't see your answer to how you masturbate? Care to share a story or a bit more?



I just finished your blog on how do you masterbate. I must confess that a couple of those were new to me and honestly I don't think I'll be molesting any bananas anytime soon.

My preferred method has always been to, slowly at first, slide my penis into a warm, wet vagina. Call me crazy but believe it or not it works almost every time!!

My second favorite method is exactly like the first substituting a mouth in place of a vagina!! I know, I know, kinda kinky, but hey, I am what I am!

No surprise that once again you've entertained, amused, and enlightened. Now I'm going to cut this short, there is a link I'm going to click on and find out how to stimulate my prostate. (as if I didn't already know).



Hello Sheri,

I'm new to your blog and have found it very interesting and informative. Now to the main reason of my email is. I like to get myself off in the shower while thinking of my wife with another person. Either with me watching or being one of two cocks that are there for her pleasure. Anyway thanks for writing your blog and sharing your thoughts and pictures.

Your latest blog is another interesting one and I have to tell you...I have done all but the water wings and banana

With my girlfriend's hand

I love your blog.

I like to find a place that is totally dark when I jerk off. I have basement with a room with no windows. I go in there and even stuff a towel under the door so there is NO LIGHT. My imagination goes wild when I open my eyes but can't see anything.


Your masturbation post is awesome.  I never tried the banana but I am going to.  My fruit of choice is a soft melon.  I cut a hole in the skin and stick my cock into the fleshy membrane of the melon.  It feels just like a real pussy especially if the melon is warm from sitting in the sun for awhile.

Using an egg is hot too.  I crack the egg and let the white and the yolk drip all over my cock.  It is great lube for awhile and then gets really sticky.

Keep up the good work.

Jerking off wearing my wife's silk panties is the best.


Dear Sheri

What I like is what you call prostate massage in your blog.  I masturbate with something in my ass.  I doesn't matter what it is as long as I can flex my asshole around it.  I have used dildos, long wooden spoons, my fingers, enema probe, whatever.  I have never had my ass fucked by a real cock but that is my greatest fantasy.  I would cum so hard if a guy was fucking my asshole.

Laying on my back with my legs in the air is one way that I like to masturbate. I have my head & shoulders on the floor, my legs on the mattress and I use my feet to push myself up so my cock is right over my face.

I watch anything; cam shows, videos, your erotic pictures (thanks Mike). when I feel like I'm going to climax that's when I push myself in line & I stop stroking & let gravity & nature take their course.  I try to stop in time so that I don't come or so that only a dribble comes out.

It's one of the more exciting ways I've found to masturbate. I've tried lots of lube, between the mattress, & many others. As long as I can reach orgasm I'll try almost anything once. I think I might try some prostate stimulation today . I haven't done that in a while.

Thanks for the ideas.



I'm jerking right now looking at your pictures.  That's all I need to get off.  Thinking of your hand on my cock.  My cock in your sweet mouth.  Fucking your tight pussy.  You make me hard every time I look at you.  Eating your wet pussy.  Making you moan.  Feeling you squirt all over my face.  I'm hard as a rock right now.  I wish you were here to open your legs for me.  I want to fuck you all night.

Masturbating with a condom on my cock is hot.

Friday, July 22, 2016

How Do You Masturbate?

It should no longer be a surprise to me how many men enjoy masturbating while being watch on line. One of the questions that I am asked most often is, “You want me to turn on my cam so you can watch me jerk off and cum?” Okay! I have to be honest. I have said, “Yes” to that question from time to time and I must admit that I found the experience stimulating.

Well, last week one of my long-time Internet friends turned on his camera and I saw something I had never seen before. He had a thin metal rod of some sort that he actually inserted into the tip of his penis. I didn’t enjoy seeing that because I could only imagine that it must have hurt. He assured me that it did not and, in fact, gave him extraordinary pleasure.

Well, that got me to thinking about the different ways that men masturbate. It didn’t take much research to discover some techniques. This may be old news to the male readers of my blog but, for the most part, it was brand new information for me.

Think about it! It is very, very rare that guys share their erotic masturbation techniques with a woman. Can you imagine going out on a first date with me and me asking, “So, tell me. When you beat your meat, what do you do that is kinky?” I can only imagine the response!

Anyway, here are some “techniques” that I discovered. You may have already tried all of these but, if not, drop me an e-mail note and tell me if or how it worked.

HOT AND COLD TECHNIQUE - Masturbate as you normally would, whatever that is but have a container (bowl or cup) of ice next to you. When you are about to ejaculate, grab the ice in your free hand. The sensation of the cold in one hand and the hot in the other hand is supposed to make your climax more dramatic.

SLIPPERY PLASTIC BAG - Fill a plastic bag with Vaseline and place your erect penis into the bag. Once you’re inside, place the bag with your penis still inside between the mattress and box spring of your bed. Pump in and out until you reach orgasm. According the Google source, this will feel great. If nothing else, at least you won’t have much of a mess to clean up.

TANTRIC METHOD – Masturbate as usual, using whatever technique you like. When you feel you are very close to orgasm - STOP! Since you will tempted to reach down and continue, put your hands behind your head. When the urge to climax has passed, resume stroking. Do this about three more times or until you simply cannot stand wait any longer.

HOT AND WET IDEA - Get a towel, soak it with hot water and ring it out so that it is not dripping wet. Put a condom on. Loosely wrap the towel around your condom-covered cock. Pump in and out of it. The wet heat simulates a vagina and – who knows – you may give up women all together. But, here is an important safety tip – Do NOT use boiling water! OUCH!

SURROGATE ADULT FILM STAR - Turn on your adult film. Imagine you are the one doing all the different things to the girl in the movie. Be sure to turn out all the lights so that your entire focus in on the TV screen. While hearing the noises on the movie and using your imagination, stroke away!

PILLOW ON TOP – I am not sure about this one but I will let you be the judge. Get naked and lay on your back. Pull a pillow on top of you. Be sure your erect penis is flat against your stomach. Pull the pillow over your penis, rubbing it back and forth. Supposedly this will give you the sensation of a woman on top.

WATER WINGS - Get a pair (they only come in pairs) of children’s water wings. Blow them up as much as possible so that the arm holes are as small and tight as possible. Coat the inside with baby oil. Stick your penis through the arm hole and pump away. The walls will be enclosed around your erect shaft, which will give you intense pleasure. I agree that it is a little weird – maybe even creepy – to use water wings but, according to the Google search, it will feel great.

TWO HANDER - While masturbating, the scrotum gets overlooked. In this method they become a part of the orgasm. While masturbating in any way you like, take your other hand and lightly and slowly massage your scrotum. This will add to your orgasm with little added effort.

BANANA HAMMOCK - Use a banana. Make a small slit in the side and tip. Scoop out most of the banana, but leave some of it as it makes a great lube. Slide it over your erect penis, lay on your stomach and slide up and down. I hope this one feels good for you because my morning cereal with bananas and milk will never look that same now that I have this image in my mind. Also, do me one favor. Please do NOT eat the banana afterwards!

TWIRL AROUND - Using a bit of lube, cover your finger and the tip of your penis with the slick stuff. Then twirl your finger around and around the head of your penis until you approach orgasm. Go faster when you get closer.

LOTS OF LUBE TECHNIQUE - Why limit the use of lube just to your penis? Use it everywhere on your body. Once you are good a slippery, use their free hand to tickle their testicles or play with their anal area. But be careful, this kind of play might make you more inclined to try other things in the future once you see how good it feels

WATER FINISH - Masturbate standing up in front of the sink. When you are just about to climax, push the head of your cock underneath a thin stream of cold water. The contributor of this idea says the cold water will make the sensation much more intense. I hope that is true but it sounds torturous to me. For sure, you won’t have to worry about much clean up afterward.

PROSTATE STIMULATION – We have devoted an entire article to this technique. You can find it by CLICKING HERE.

SIMULATED STRANGER – This sounds a little strange but sit on one of your hands until it is tingly – that “falling asleep” feeling. Then use that hand to masturbate. It might feel like someone else is working on your penis until you get off.

USE A MIRROR - Look into the mirror as you masturbate. Bonus points if you use a mirror in which you can’t see your face, so you can imagine who might be jerking you off. I can see where this might be a great deal of fun since you can imagine any gender or body type, etc. But guys – PLEASE – don’t imagine yourself stroking yourself. That defeats the purpose and candidly, it’s too weird!

Well, there you have it.  I suspect that there is nothing on this page that you haven't already thought of and tried but it was fun to write this for you. 

Please take a minute and send me a note to and tell me if you tried any of these ideas.  Also, if you have a special way of giving yourself pleasure, I would love to hear about that too.